George Michael - Nelson Mandela Concert 1988

Waiting for that World

Another year end arrives

With seasons flying in frenzy

My life took a turn -

Not known before;

I missed the beauty – Of

The other road before the turn!

Nothing can ever give me,

Nor show me those paths again-

That lay hidden in the mist of beliefs!

Their beauty –unrivalled

About which I knew not-

But my heart knows well now!

On the days of sadness and of joy-

In nature’s soul – I search-

For the signs of that unknown world!

In the song of a beautiful bird-

And in the dance of butterflies-

In cloudless night skies of shining stars -

And in the rhythm of falling raindrops-

Heart tunes to hear the angelic voice;

I wonder how far that world is-

Or is it just around me?-

In the air I breathe and the

Wind that caress my face?

Or in the warmth of one’s love and kindness?

Without which my days here

Are just like the waves of the sea-

Embracing the shores again and again

Like the daily rituals of some bygone times!

Mirror on the wall

On the bare walls of the little room

There hangs a mirror – polished and shiny!

Stone-studded beautiful roses

Adorns its shape – oval and thin!

Not a mark nor a patch - lowered the perfection

On the frame or on the surface!

But still obvious – a blandness so weird!

I wonder why and doubt the room - so small

Suddenly there comes a woman

With her infant son hugged close –

With his little arms around her shoulders!

Their beautiful eyes shine as they see the mirror!

And with a smile so perfect - looks at it-

I see the blandness go away,

And the craftsmanship rewarded!

On the forehead of her little love

She presses her lips – eyes closed

A moment of selfless love!

Captured by the mirror on the wall

And the heart of a silent beholder!

Don't go far away...

Oh my dear brother and friend

From a place far away from mine

You make me smile through my tears

With your songs!

In times of darkness

Comforts with sweet angelic voice!

You make me laugh with

That sense of humour,

Everyday you show me how to help others,

And asks to listen to my heart

To find peace!

Now they say you’re gone..

But I saw you just now..

And you sang to me to watch TV all day on Xmas!

I believe and I know- you’re standing there

Behind that tree in the garden,

As if playing hide n’ seek..

Don’t go far away..

For I need to come and find you

Else I’ll lose my way in this world

Without your voice singing!

George Michael - A Tribute to the Great Singer

Where have you gone, Orpheus of our times?

Leaving behind your lyre and songs ...

The season of giving, mourns – shattered

With beautiful flowers and burning candles! 

Tributes in teary eyes and sad, soulful renditions!

Oh let this just be a dream…

I close my eyes to reject the truth

But my anger swirls up - has no bounds

Anger at a world of thankless people

Who hailed you once, only to disdain later

And pushed you from calm waters to a chaotic whirlpool

Of people wearing masks with hollow feelings

For whom you sang relentlessly, till your throat ached

And danced till your feet bled..

And took the hard blows of sharp stones thrown

For reasons which are of no concern to them!

But your voice drowned the cruel Sirens' yells !

And where have you gone now?
Leaving your Argonauts in devastation!

The rise of sun seems just a ritual!

And the sea of despair is deep and dark-

Lost in the roaring waves of pain

The world grieves for a kind soul, gone so fast.

The loss of an icon whom I never met,

And might meet, only when my road ends,

This enigma of affliction - I do not know;

Pain never seems to ebb away-

And I wander like a cloud,

When the angelic voice sings so beautiful-

Of life and love and hope and guilt,

Asking for freedom and patience.

Eyes well up with tears

I want to hear no more songs

My feet fail to tap to the rhythm of notes

And my lips hesitate to hum a tune

Can the flow of tears, ever be a solace?

For a heart, heavy with loss?

But I say - Oh Orpheus of our times, do not glance back-
The beasts and the Maenads of Dionysus are still here!

You were the gift from God to an undeserved world,

Don’t let your generosity make you suffer more.

Go home back to the angels-

And sing with the Seraphim in heaven

Where the Lord and whom you loved, wait for you!

Remembering George Michael

Way back in the early 90s, I was visiting the 'Greetings Galaxy' - a shop where you used to get Archies and Hallmark cards in TVM. On the wall facing the entrance, there hung a life like picture of a handsome young man, who from the looks I presumed to be a singer. It was signed George Michael. I didn't know who he was at that time. Because in those days,for a middle-class family girl like me, western/pop music meant ABBA, BoneyM and a few names like Michael Jackson, Madonna and Lionel Ritchie. But this name somehow got registered in my mind. Couple of years later, after marriage, I came across the same face in my husband's audio cassette collection. I then came to know that he's talent personified in pop music, had already carved his name as icon in the pop genre through the band Wham! and that he's now on his successful solo spree! Together we listened to his songs, bought his new albums.., I don't know how many times I had listened to the ballad, 'Father Figure' in those days!

As priorities in life changed and giving the best as a mother, wife as well as a working woman became my sole aims, George Michael and his music gradually faded to the background but never forgotten. As years progressed and Internet and Google became part of one's routine life, my outlook, interests and tastes took different turns. Bryan Adams, Sting, Duran Duran, Eric Clapton and  Kenny G also entered my list of favorites - that too only selected songs. But the melancholy of the song Father figure  always haunted me and it still haunts.

A year back, a routine rummaging through the Internet pages brought in memories of this singer once again and with sadness I read about his plight. And the way he looked - less confident, overweight..a stark contrast to the George Michael of the 90s...with a life that has spiraled out of his control. But I was happy that he was not bankrupt and that he still continued to be one among the richest pop singers with a sale of 100 million solo albums to his credit. And then suddenly, one morning I hear the news that he has said goodbye to all of us..at the age of just 53...It is so very sad...And everyday, stories about his undisciplined life are pouring out- of chaos, confusions, drugs, sexual identity and what all. I now understand that he was indeed bankrupt - He was rich with money but had no one to understand or care for...At the same time, he was kind and generous to many but anonymously...He was reclusive, feeling dejected and abandoned, forever finding solace in drugs..

Even now like all other music lovers, I cannot come to terms with the fact that he's no more. And  I just wanted to pen these thoughts because that life-like picture on the wall of that shop is still so fresh in my memory even after all these years...And I am angry at this world for ruining the life of a God-gifted man...I am sure in that eternal world, along with MJ, Freddie Mercury, George Harrison and others, he'll sing songs for us in that mesmerizing voice, making our feet tap and lips hum once again, when we reach there....And if there is rebirth like we believe, I pray to God to give him a life of discipline, success, and fame as a musician in his next life - and that he will forever be remembered in history as a great singer, as he had always wanted in this life...